Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Last night when I was with Corinne and sifting through murky thoughts popping in and out of my mind, I thought of an idea for a board game.

I'm not going to say it on here, because I want to work on it for a little while and see if it's actually a good idea.

It sounded fun at 4 in the morning, though! That's always a good sign...

It involves family and eating and friends too. That is all I will say. The rest will have to go in my ideas book. I get ideas all the time. Of course I have an ideas book.

I swear Corinne smiles at my jokes. She is so responsive and sweet! She's sleeping right now, of course - I wouldn't be writing this if she were up. I'd be hanging out with her of course.

So, today I wrote this blog entry, and, if I have more time, I'm going to read more of "A Prayer for Owen Meany", which I got from the library.

I am a big advocate for the library. You can get so many books and they are all free and you don't have to look for more room on your bookshelves to keep them...and everybody is sharing them.

Of course if I were Howie Mandel or a germaphobic person I would never even set foot in a library...but since I am not a library is a paradise to me.

Speaking of books I've realized something about myself. I don't need gifts, but if you ever wanted to get me a gift, I would be happy with some kind of book or a pair of pajamas. Because Ideally I find myself either reading or writing and in my pajamas. Jammies are the greatest. So comfortable and even if you have a lot of them I think you can still have more, as long as you have room in your closet or shelves.

Yesterday I finished up the laundry. I find that a great accomplishment. I wonder how my Mom had coped with laundry from 8 kids and 2 adults, when it seems a great feat to just get mine, Steve's and Corinne's done. 

Today marks just a few days left until I go back to work. 

Speaking of being home, though, I've noticed something: The character of Jackie from Roseanne dated George Clooney??? How?? That is a great mystery to me. She was one lucky lady. I was mystified when I saw this. That's right I've been netflixing Roseanne. AND it is fantastic. It is a great show. Especially the first season - I've been working my way through it, and it is very well done! I really like it. I remember it getting kind of crazy in the end - specifically the years when Big Bang Theory person came in and Becky became girl from Scrubs....but in the beginning I really liked it. 

Well I hear a baby starting to move around! Bye folks...

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

From 5 pm until 10 pm, we had a screamer.

The poor baby had gas, and I held her and bounced her and rocked her in every position possible. For four hours. Then, when Steve came home from his meeting after work at 9, he did the same until 10.

At 9 I took a break and ate a sub for dinner. It was delicious.

I'm going back to sleep for now. She's sleeping, and I should be,too. I'm wondering how today will go...

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Thursday Corinne was officially one month old. Steve stepped on the scale, and then stepped on the scale with her in his arms, and she is now 9 and 1/2 pounds -- according to that system! She was 7 pounds 7 ounces when she was born.

Time is already going by fast! She already can hold her head up and she laughs -she's been laughing in her sleep since she was a newborn. She usually will stop crying if the vacuum is on, and loves when you sing to her or play Stevie Wonder or anything from the Graceland album. I love her so much, I could hold her all day long.

Thanksgiving was delicious. I have so much to be thankful for. I try and give thanks every day - so giving thanks and eating food I don't get to eat every day a welcome activity.

Next week at this time I'll be (hopefully) sleeping because I'll be going back to work the next day.

I already get up a couple of times at night, so the plan is for Steve to give her the last feeding before we go to sleep around 10, 11 or 12 and then I get up for the next one around 3 or 4. Then the next time she eats will be right before we go into work. Once we're really in the swing of things, I'd ideally want to go to the gym before work and Steve would go after work.

We will come to visit Corinne at lunch time. I'm really looking forward to that. Then we'll go back to work again.

After that, we go home.

I don't know if this is really boring information, but I like making lists, and so it helps me to list out what I'm doing in a day. I could make lists all the time. Sometimes I do.

Sometimes I simplify my lists into other lists. Like, for example:

Plan for going back to work:
Feed Corinne
Lunch with Corinne
Home with Corinne

Or sometimes I'll say something like screw making a list I'll do whatever - and then I make another list.
Or I'll add something to the old list, like -Remember to pray! Remember to try to write a blog entry! Remember to clean!

Until the piece of paper becomes crumpled and has food stains on it and everything is crossed out and then do you know what I do?

I make another list.

I guess people can be creatures of habit, as that saying goes.

Basically, though, it doesn't matter what my lists say. If I have a day where I am able to be with Corinne and my family and friends in some way shape or form, I will be glad. That's just how I work.

Everything else is just in the details. And I'm not REALLY a details kind of person.

I should go to bed. I don't know what I'm doing still up. I am going to be very tired when I wake up in an hour, or two, or ten minutes. Whatever it might be.....

I just wanted to spend a little bit of time with my thoughts. And my pets, who are hanging around me right now. Steve and the baby are asleep upstairs.

Goodnight everybody.

Monday, November 21, 2011

I really can't get over the craziness that is daytime t.v. on basic cable!

So many court shows. SO many. And they are full of crazy people!

I don't just watch t.v. all day. But it's on in the background a lot and when Corinne is eating, for example, I'll watch - and I don't even know how to describe it other than you just can't look away. I don't know why.

OK I have to go, dinner time! Falafel tonight!

Sunday, November 20, 2011

So far I am nowhere near fitting into my pre-pregnancy pants.

Just want to put that out there into the universe.

I do plan on fitting in them once again, someday.

I have been doing some reading on the subject and I don't want to rush into losing weight, because I read things about damaging your body and not eating enough causing toxins in your breastmilk. That does not sound cool. So, for the sake of Corinne and I, I'm just going to ease into a workout routine, and continue to eat food. I like food anyway. :)

That all being said: I am so happy about this time of year--I can't wait to eat the delicious snacks and deserts! I won't go crazy, but I'm not going on a diet either! So happy to just eat and enjoy the deliciousness. I will continue to try and eat right, too - I've been taking multivitamins and drinking juice from the juicer (today I had a carrot and orange and apple juice) and I guess I'm just going to try and stay as balanced and healthy as possible but not have a guilty concience when I eat.

Same goes for working out - I'll move around as much as I can but I'm not running a marathon next week or anything.

I'm pretty happy with just going with the flow.

And the flow of time itself has brought us to the Thanksgiving and Christmas Season, as I mentioned above. We are going to decorate our house so much this year, in honor of Corinne's first Christmas! Will she remember it? I don't think so. But - I think she'll like looking at the colors and the lights :) We are planning on putting some money in savings for her education fund for Christmas this year. This is because: She needs money in that fund and also she won't remember her first Christmas so now's a good time to do a gift like that.

ANyway- got to go! I hear her waking up!

Saturday, November 19, 2011

I am going to give you an example of the things that pop into my mind when I am up in the tiny new hours of the morning with Corinne....

"Seasame Street. Burt. Burt Reynolds. Whatever happened to him? Is he dead? Canonball Run. Good movie. I think it's like Dukes of Hazard. Duke...The Duke.... I love Ron Burgandy. I mean Swanson. I love Ron Swanson. If Ron Swanson were real, I would want to be his friend. Oh my it's 3:30 am. I can't keep my eyes open. Ah! Yes I can- Loud noises really help with that..."

That's what my thoughts are like, at that time. Sentence fragments. Do they make sense? You decide. I can't tell. I made a mental note to record such thoughts in my blog, just to document what it's like to wake up at random hours of the night. Sometimes I think about the day - but then I just get confused so I mostly think about - well- random things that pop into my mind.

When I came back in the room (I usually bring Corinne into her room and feed her while I sit on the rocking chair and change her and that way the light can be on and I can let Stevie sleep - I let him sleep at night while he's at work and then when I go back to work too we'll divide up the night more) - anyway when I came back in the room the other night, I told Steve I turned the space heater off.

"I turned off the space heater, Steve."

"What? Huh? How will you feed the baby?"

"...I just fed the baby, and then I turned off the space heater."

"How are you feeding the fucking baby? ughhhhhh."

To answer this I just fell asleep. Steve doesn't normally swear. I think he was in the middle of a dream...he has "no recollection" of this conversation.

I have a feeling I don't think I will like waking him out of his sleep on a regular basis. He's a pretty deep sleeper. He says he doesn't even hear the baby when she wakes up at night. I think I'll have to develop a safe system of waking him up in the middle of the night, when we do divide up the baby waking up time. Maybe I'll resort to poking him or something. We'll see.

I'm going to go do a couple of chores around the house now for the remainder of time Corinne is sleeping. Thanks for reading!

Thursday, November 17, 2011

So I love being at home with Corinne.

Some days are pretty crazy - like when I eat something that causes her to have gas and didn't realize that I did until she screams for a few hours at a time - for example.

One of those days was so bad, when she'd calm down for a few minutes I'd grab some chocolate chips and eat them, thinking, "Man today is pretty rough! These chocolate chips will make me feel better."

This was bad thinking, seeing as eating chocolate causes gas in babies when you are breastfeeding them! I had no idea. She had gas for 9 hours that day. It was not good.

Looks like I'm taking a mini-vacation from Chocolate for my babe.

Then there are some days where all she would like to do is eat and sleep. I those days are great - and I steal her for big chunks of time just snuggling her. Not the whole time though, I do put her down to lay in her basinnet as well so she's not in shock when I go back to work and she has some basinnet time at her Grandma's house. I don't want to talk about going back to work right now though :)

I would like to mention how fast we go through diapers, though! My goodness, I thought we'd go through a lot, but I guess I never really thought about it for a while! Luckily, we got a lot of "diaper donations", especially in the "1" stage, which she will be in from 8 pounds to 14 pounds - and she just made the 8 pound range recently. She is growing up so fast!

Last night Steve and I gave her her first "Tubby" bath - this was interesting! As soon as we had her in the water she gave us this look like "This. Is. Fantastic. How very relaxing." And then - let me just say we had to give her another bath! But - she did very well. After two baths, she was squeaky clean and smelled so sweet and she didn't even cry much! She's a pro. A bath-taking pro.

Today while Corinne and I were hanging out, I watched a little Bob Ross on PBS. It was great. He is so kind and I love the way he talks and he makes painting look so easy. I could watch Bob Ross all day. He is just so calming. I feel like watching Bob Ross should be listed as something a person commonly does to calm down - like drinking tea or going in a hot tub or eating an ice cream sundae (that last one maybe I just do, I don't know if it's generally an activity most people think of to calm down, but if not it's highly recommended. Though I can't eat ice cream right now either...but maybe that's for the best).

Anyway, last night I went somewhere without Corinne for the first time. I went to Wegmans, just for about ten minutes. It was the first time I drove in a month. It was the first time I've been without Corinne. I figured I should start weening myself off of time with her, as I won't be around her at work. I'd rather have her around, but it was ok. I got everything on my list, and left. I didn't get any extras - which I sometimes do. Maybe it is a sign of maturity. Or maybe I just didn't want to be there for too long. Who knows.

Tonight our friends Holly and Tim and Ryan are coming over for dinner. Steve is
making sauce (he actually made it last night, it's warming on the stove right now).

If we had enough money Steve would own a restaurant. I think I mentioned that before. I think his restaurant would be successful - just because I think his food is amazing and he's really passionate about it and I think he's very good with money and businesslike things. For now he will cook for fun and I will eat the delicious concoctions and I will write for fun and he can read what I write and be calm like I would be if I had an ice cream sundae handy.

Basically, we'll keep doing what we love even if we don't have the money or connections to do it on a larger scale. Who needs larger scales anyway? I never even liked the small ones. Ba dom dom. That is my impression of someone playing the drumset after a joke is told.

Anyway- I'm in a goofy mood. I just ate some wheat thins. They were delicious. Apparently they make me goofy. You know what? I have got to stop blaming my silliness on the things I eat. It's not fair to the food, or the food industry if my blog gets really big and people in the food industry start paying attention, that is. I am silly because that is who I am. When I'm in a good mood, anyway. And that's that.

Before I go, though, I have to say that Corinne finally met a swaddle that actually swaddled her in. Usually she is Mrs. HoudiniBabyofLove, and she gets out of our swaddles (or the doctor's swaddles or her aunts and uncles swaddles or even those swaddle things with the velcro) in two seconds flat. At least. But my Aunt got us a swaddler that ACTUALLY works! We were so happy it kept her in (and highly comfortable, from the looks of it - I definitely would like one in my size just from looking at how satisfied she looked in it) until she spit up all over it, but once it's back from the mountins of washington, it will go back in action.

Well, look at the time, I have to go! Have a good night, everyone!

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Corinne is already almost a month old. Three and a half weeks old, to be exact. She is growing bigger every day.

This also means that there are only two and a half weeks that I have to hang out with her all day. This makes me sad. Right now she is sleeping...she is so sweet. I don't want to leave her. Sometimes I wish we could just live in the mountains somewhere, just making our own food and not having to depend on money.

But, we've got to pay the bills, so I've got to go back in two and a half weeks. I do love my job, and love who I work with - and I miss them! I just am dreading not being with Corinne. At least she will be with her grandma - that part is good.

Anyway - last Friday Corinne got to meet Lucy for the first time! Lucy is our friends Kathy and Brian's baby, who was born three weeks before Corinne. They came just after dinner and we got to talk and the babies mostly slept - and it was really a good time. I can't wait for them to get to know each other!

This past weekend we visited Rochester. That was great because we saw some friends and family that didn't get to meet Corinne yet. It was so nice to see everybody. I really miss Rochester, but I am glad that we only live about an hour away so we can visit more frequently than not.

Corinne amazes me every day. She laughs in her sleep a lot - my mom said she thinks she got it from me because I was laughing so much while I was pregnant with her! I wouldn't be surprised! She also looks at us and smiles and is cuddly and loving and I can't think of enough good adjectives. She just makes our world complete, I guess that's the best way to put it.

Steve and I are really lucky to have a large support system. Sometimes we think about what it might be like to be a teenager who is alone without a supportive family or a significant other, and how they end up raising their babies. Sometimes we also think about how people have twins - either situation, we feel these parents are exceptional and have super human powers.

Corinne makes noises in her sleep all the time. She likes to make noises in general. Steve's mom thinks it means she will be very talkative. I can definitely see that!! My sister Julie said I made all kinds of noises when I was a baby too - and now look at me I talk so much I have to also have a blog so that I can keep talking even when my mouth isn't open.

Corinne also now has auburn locks of hair. My mom said my brother David had auburn hair until he turned two and then his hair turned Fire Engine Red! I would love it if she had red hair. I would love whatever color, for that matter, but I really would love it if it were red! Her eyes are very blue right now as well - I know eyes change a lot in the first six months, but I wonder if they'll stay this way, they look so blue. I guess time will tell!

She just made more noises from her little basinnet. I love those sounds! Now I am thinking about going back to work again and not hearing those sounds. It will be like going into a whole new world.

Anyway- I should go! I've been working on writing thank you notes to people who kindly gave Corinne gifts after she was born! I want to finish those soon, and send them out.

Hope everyone is having a good Wednesday.....

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Friday, November 4, 2011

I still am in awe that Corinne lives in the outside world now, and not my belly.

I am also in awe that the room is done; and how our house actually feels like a home after two years of living in it. I know Steve feels the same, he said it the other day and I totally agree with him.

Steve is thinking about refurbishing my old dollhouse for Corinne. He loves miniatures, and I know Corinne would really not only love the dollhouse but eventually, when she's older, really appreciate that it was her dad that made it look nice for her. We still have time of course, to do that, but just saying that he's going to do that makes me smile.

He also is thinking of setting up his train set; I bet she'd like that, too.

I don't know if I mentioned, but the week before Corinne was born we kept hearing Corinne Bailey Rae songs on the radio - and they were all songs we haven't heard on the radio in years!

I can't believe she'll be two weeks old on Monday.

This weekend my parents are coming in to bring my Grandmother's old rocking chair to our house. My mom had her friend Shotzee work on the cushions for it, and she stained the wood. I can't wait to see it!

Steve loves that my mom had someone named Shotzee working on the rocker. He likes the idea of my mom giving someone named Shotzee orders.

My mom wouldn't give Shotzee orders, she's friends with Shotzee, but whenever she talks about Shotzee she says the name Shotzee over and over again, kind of like this, and it makes us chuckle. I don't know why.

Anyway, Shotzee hath delivered, and we shall see her gift on Sunday! Hooray! I can't wait to rock the baby girl!!

Corinne is also going to the first place that isn't related to hospitals or doctors appointments Sunday: her Grandma and Papa Galbo's for dinner! So exciting. She's growing up so fast...

Steve sold our wii set and got a juicer for us. Missie said that makes us officially lame. I am totally cool with being lame, though! I love this juicer already. We get so many veggies from our co-op, and it is often difficult to fit them all into all of our meals in the week, and this certainly helps to clean out the fridge and give us more vitamins. I'm all for that juicer.

Plus, I am breastfeeding, so the more vitamins I get, the more vitamins Corinne gets, so that is very important.

I am really looking forward to the weekend. I really like being with Corinne during the day, but we miss her daddy very much. Corinne loves being held by Stevie - last night she gripped his fingers for so so long while he held her...and she falls asleep when he sings to her, and sometimes when he is just talking to her.

I love when he is home, too, and now he will be for two whole days!

Today, besides being with Corinne, I learned what braising is. I made a dish that Kathy bought for us at Wegmans, and the directions said to braise it. I think I braised it just fine because it was very yummy. It was a pizziola I think? I had to fry it the beef that was stuffed with vegetables and then braise it in tomato sauce. I normally don't cook, I do the dishes, but I will try to learn things - I was half expecting the kitchen to blow up, but it didn't, so that's always a good thing.

Anyway - mostly I just wanted to write, while Corinne was taking a nap. I am so so excited for the weekend; just being with our family.

Speaking of family and family values, a friend from college posted this, and I remember reading it a few years ago, and I'm glad I saw it again. I think about it a lot. If you liked Mister Rogers, please feel free to read it, too. I love this article so much. I want to show Corinne how to be positive in this world, too, just like he was!

Have a good weekend, everyone! :)

Thursday, November 3, 2011

I read somewhere that a lot of new moms today have blogs, especially because of the late - night feedings, being up, and just wanting to write - and usually what they write about is their babies.

Makes sense.

I mean, I'm up, and normally I wouldn't be. I'm really a "morning" person I have come to realize. Well, sometimes it takes me a little while to wake up, but I still characterize myself as a "morning person" for the following reasons:

1. I love Breakfast.

2. I love looking out the window at the morning skies and the morning sun coming up.

3. I love Breakfast.

That's mainly it. I do have some energy in the morning, typically, as well. I also get sleepy (usually) around 10 pm at the latest.

Now that I am a new mom, I can say that I am more of an "any time, day or night, I am probably up and moving in some way, shape or form" person.

I will tell you the following reasons why:

1. Baby Corinne is hungry.

2. Baby Corinne is hungry.

3. Baby Corinne is hungry, and oh look the sun is coming out again, it's very pretty, but now Corinne isn't hungry anymore and fell asleep and I'm very tired and I go to bed.

That's typically why, really.

But you can't blame her, I'm hungry all the time, too! Sleepy, too, for that matter.

But I love it. I love her. I wouldn't normally be up in the middle of the night zoning out and staring at a wall, while thinking about all kinds of things...but I am now, a lot, and I actually like it.

The waking up out of an hour or two of sleep is kind of difficult at first, but as soon as I see her it helps to sober me up....I would do anything for her.

Sometimes, when she has trouble falling asleep, I will play Adele's "To Make You Feel My Love" to her. I love that song, it really sums up a lot of how I feel for her. I would do anything for her at all. I know her daddy feels the same way.

She is a total daddy's girl, by the way. As soon as she hears his voice, she seems to be more alert than ever, and today he held her for the longest time and she wouldn't let go of his fingers.

I love that.

Anyway- I just wanted to write a little bit more, because I wanted to chronicle some of these moments of how I feel.

Because if I don't, I feel like - now this might not make sense but it does to me at 1:30 a.m. after I've been staring at walls for a little while...

If I don't write this stuff down I feel like it's like the Neverending Story with the Nothing that might eat up these memories....I'm afraid I might forget little things like this. I don't want to do that. I want everything to last. I want her to know I love her so much.

Just one more thing before I try to sleep for another 45 minutes to an hour:

When she wakes up from her sleep it is the cutest thing I have ever seen (Sometimes, of course! :) )
She stretches her little arms out and she smiles, and then she stretches some more and smiles, and stretches some more, and smiles--

And I love that.

OK of course it is all not roses and rainbows over here but I just really really love her and wanted to say it in words, write it down, because--

I just love her. And I don't mind saying it a million times because that's how I feel.

Anyway - my eyelids feel like curtains, very heavy ones, so I should go.

Hope you all have a good day - or night - or whatever it is at this hour.
Corinne and I get to hang out all day, and I love that.

At least for a few more weeks.

She had another Doctor's appointment today, just to see her weight.

It has taken a little while to get her back to her birthweight. So as far as today is concerned, she's up to 7 pounds, 3 ounces. She was 7 pounds, 7 ounces at birth, and they said hopefully by her Monday two week appointment she will be back up to that!

Got to go, just wanted to say that real quick!!