Saturday, March 31, 2012

Day 50. 

I totally just smashed this challenge into two. I karate-chopped my challenge.

 I am awesome.

I feel like one of those ladies in the losing weight commercials with the before and after pics....only before I was someone who said she likes to write but never wrote anything, to someone who writes every day! I went from a dreamer to a doer. I am inspiring myself to actually do more with my life! Ahhh! 

So basically I have a list of 3 things I want to do now that I know I can do something I've dreamed about for at least 50 consecutive days. (And looking forward to 50 more by the way! Bam!)

1. I want to make time to work out every day, in some way shape or form - if I could carve out time to write every day....I can carve out time to do some crunches or lift some hand weights or go up and down the stairs a few more times than normal. I might even do leg lifts while writing my blog. I'm lifting my legs right now. Ahh! Sky's the limit, people. Can't be a good influence to Corinne by sitting around on my butt every time I get the chance. I want her to know that it is possible to do fun things in life without having your bottom glued to a chair!

2. I want to do more home improvements! I want to make my house look even cuter than it already does. I think now that I know that getting goals accomplished takes some time...I can really be okay with working on different home improvement projects a little bit at a time, and then after a few months enjoying the benefits of all those days of little bits of hard work! 

3. I am now even more motivated to keep working on my novel. I'm in the habit of writing...and at the very least I'm making a really cool story for Corinne to read someday....and at the most I'll be a really famous writer and able to show Corinne the whole world as I travel for book signings. Ahh. 

So basically I've learned that I can dream things AND do them. That is way better than just dreaming them. I've also learned (and this is important for an impatient lady like me)  : it is good to get things done little by little rather than all at once. There are benefits to working hard for a long time at just one thing. SO, little by little I will continue my quest for 100 days of blogging, and in the meantime, little by little, I will fit in exercise by doing some baby lifts or random squats in the kitchen or whatever strikes me whenever I want, and I'll keep adding to my novel little by little, and I'll add some little improvements to my house (little by little) and...basically that's that. I'm just going to keep on keepin' on. Because I'm not so bad at that, after all. 


Friday, March 30, 2012

Day 49

Soo I've been working until 6 or 7 almost every night for the past few weeks.

I like my job, but being away from my baby girl for that long really gets me down.

So, I'm just going to write a list of 3 things I want to do this weekend with Corinne so I don't have to think about how I just got home at 7:30 and she fell asleep at 8:45 (That is simply not enough time with Corinne), and instead I can think about being with her this weekend.

 1. I want to just cuddle her and kiss her and snuggle.

2. I want to take her to a store or two with Stevie, and show her the world just a little bit at a time.

3. I want to dance with her and sing and talk with her. She is a very good talker. Her growls are fantastic.

 I just miss her. She's sleeping and I hear her sighing in her sleep and I'm sighing too because it is tough to be apart. But....I'm glad the weekend is here. I'm glad I can see her all day and all night for two whole days. 

Oh, I just read this over. I am such the complainer today. I hope you all have fabulous weekends....and I hope you all get to do at least three fun things while you're weekending.


Thursday, March 29, 2012

Day 48

3 T.V. Shows I loved that did not last. Why?

1. Freaks and Geeks. James Franco, Seth Rogen, Jason Segel, oh my. That show was well written, funny, and smart. It was just....good. It only lasted one season. ONE season. I really do not understand why......

2. Pushing Daisies. I also called it "The Pie-man". I LOVED that show. I could cry thinking about how it is gone and how it didn't last long and how fabulous it was. Only two seasons, that is all it lasted. Are you kidding me? It was about a guy who could bring people back to life, under some pretty specific conditions. And it was a mystery show. And it was quirky and cute and addictive.....and it involved pie. I LOVE pie. Who does not love pie? Seriously ask around, you will find not a person who does not love pie. Anyway....back to what I was saying. All of a sudden it was just.... BAM! Cancelled. Just like that. 

3. Party Down. Also only two seasons. That show was hilarious. It was about out of work actors who tried to make a living in the catering business while auditioning for gigs on the side. It had that guy from Parks and Rec in it - Adam Scott. It even had an episode centered around Steve Guttenberg - who doesn't love that? 

Bonus Mention: Arrested Development. It is only a Bonus Mention and not in the top 3 because it lasted 4 Seasons, which is slightly longer than one or two. Still should have lasted longer than that...but they ARE making a movie and putting out a few more cannot complain about that! Love that show...

So these are my t.v. grievances. I don't even watch t.v. anymore. I just stopped. But if I do ever want to watch t.v. again, I'd rather just watch an episode of one of these shows. Or maybe Parks and Rec. I didn't give that one a chance in the first season. Then when I did, I was so happy. Ron is the greatest. He shares my love of breakfast food. Oh Ron. 

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Day 47

3 times I've been known to black out

1. When I am putting away the dishes. I'll be putting away the dishes in the kitchen one second, and then the next I'm in another room of the house, as though nothing ever happened. I can't remember putting away the dishes. Then, later, I'll hear Steve say, "Katie, where is the the 3/4 cup measuring cup? Why is it not hanging with the other measuring cups?" Or, "Have you seen the forks?" 

And I have no idea how to answer him.

Because I must have blacked out again when I did the dishes. It is the only explanation.

So then I respond, saying something like,"Which forks?" or, "Oh, that cup? I'm sure it's inside of the 1 cup should look again." And I then I quickly change the subject to try and deflect on to something else while I wildly look around the kitchen trying to piece things together and trace my tracks. Usually I'll say something like, "Look at the dog! Doesn't he look big today?"  Or something like that.

Then, he will say something like, "I know what you're doing and it's not going to work. We need to find forks. We need forks to eat."

And then we conduct a search very close to what I imagine the searches are like on shows like CSI. I do not watch CSI but I bet there is some kind of searching that happens.

And then eventually, we find some stuff. In the wrong cupboard, sometimes. When I was pregnant, items somehow were found inside the fridge. Sitting, unaware, in the crisper or on the shelf next to the milk.

2. Another time I black out is when I need to crunch the numbers to figure out a tip. I get this weird anxiety about not giving enough tip, or giving way too much, like the time my sister tipped the pizza guy 20 bucks on accident. The way I see it, if I mess up on a tip, I'm either losing the hard earned money I've spent lots of time and energy hard-earning, or, the person who needs to be tipped is losing out on hard-earned money. I want it to be a good balance of good karmic niceness and also not breaking the bank.

 I understand the whole "double the tax" business .....but sometimes I just don't know what to do. Like at the hair dresser's....what if I hate it? I shouldn't take it out on the person by not tipping enough...but what if I have to somehow go somewhere else to get it fixed? I'll need money for that, too...hopefully I won't go to too many places after the hair has been chopped off or I'll end up looking like Mr. Clean and I won't have any money left.

3. Apparently just now. I thought it was just 6 p.m. It's 10:10? My goodness.......

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Day 46

3 things that actually happened recently

1. A gorilla escaped from his cage at the Buffalo Zoo. I am really glad we were not there that day.

2. Steve made me a mocha and I loved it. It tasted like Willy Wonka and Tim Hortons had a baby and that baby was Steve and he knew how to make tasty mochas.

3. The dog put his mouth almost completely over our cat's entire head. He looked at us as if to say, "I'll do it if you give me the sign." We did not give the sign, and the cat still lives to this day. 

Monday, March 26, 2012

Day 45

Corinne likes to growl at us.

If you try to get her to talk, she will say, "GROWLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOWLOWLOWLOWL."

If you try to get her to sing, she will say,

If you dance with her, she will say, 

The dog turns his head to the side when she talks like that. Her hair sticks straight up in the air, and she growls. She is totally ridiculous and I love it. I'd do anything for that little chubby cheeked-lady woman.

Including trying to sing her to sleep. I tried singing Phantom of the Opera songs to her tonight and I kept getting interrupted by Steve laughing at me in the kitchen. Apparently I'm not headed for American Idol any time soon, but at least we still have our china. And she fell asleep. She just sighed. 

I wonder if she'll growl in her sleep.

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Day 44

Oslo the bear
sat on a chair
and listened to songs
sung by Fred Astaire.
His feet would dance all day
and dance all night
but his behind kept sitting
on his teeny tiny chair

until one day
with a knock at the door
Odette the bear came in
and kicked the chair
to the floor

"Oslo!" she cried
"You're butt is so fat
I almost had a heart attack."

This statement was incentive
for Oslo, that day,
to dance with his whole body
up on the floor
and he'd dance with Odette
and he'd dance by himself
and he'd dance with Fred Astaire
playing from his computer
on the shelf

and Odette and Oslo
the dancing bears
they formed a dance school
freeing behinds from chairs

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Day 43
A very very very short story.

A very very very small family

was half a fingernail tall

and lived beneath the keys

of a computer that sat next to the wall

and every morning and every night

they'd have to run really fast

to escape the pushes of buttons

so that they wouldn't be pushed on or smashed.

They got their sleep in the '90s

they slept a little less in '02,

but as soon as some guy called a f a c e b o o k arrived

they're zombies, for sleep is much due!

Friday, March 23, 2012

Day 42

A poem.

There once was a little old elderly

named Ambalajambalaboom

who lived in a cave
by the sea in the waves

and would sing by the light of the moon

(the moon)

he'd sing by the light of the moon.

And every night he would 
-rat a tat tat-

his echolocation-type voices

singing songs to remind himself
(rat a tat tat)
of the cliffs that stood under the moon

(the moon)

yeah, he'd sing by the light of the moon.

'Cause he was quite a quick little bat
as he'd do his small trick that consumed little bats

and he'd see the whole world
through one sigh

(one sigh)

and he'd see the whole world
through one sigh.


who says to see
you need eyes?

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Day 41

5 things I am slightly curious about.

1. I wonder: if when there are archaeologists eons from now studying our civilization, they will look at rides in Disney World and deem they were devices used for religious purposes. 

2. I wonder:  if I played an instrument (the violin, perhaps) how different my life would be.

3. I wonder: if I won the lottery, would I really run straight to the airport and buy an around-the-world ticket for my family and me....or....would I just go straight to Wegmans and stock pile on delicious treats and have a party at my house first and THEN get the around-the-world-Ticket.....or......would I just quit my job and nap and hang out with my family for about a month and a half and THEN get the ticket. What would I do? I'd probably do the nap and hang out and then go. Just to catch up on some sleep. I wonder if that's weird.

4. I wonder: will I ever be that girl who can go for a ten mile run? Why do I want to be that girl? Am I that in need of being exhausted? I do not understand. 

5. I wonder: it seems like there is a lottery of where and when you are born. Would I be the same person if I were born in Turkey under the rising sun? Maybe. Why am I spending so much time wondering about this stuff? I should just go to bed. 

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Day 40

Sometimes I just feel like this:

That's all I really want to say today.....

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Day 39

Springtime is for lovers. that a thing?

Three Books I Recommend (because I love them so) --

1. The Book Thief, by Marcus Zusak. 

If I described it to you, you would say - "Hold the phone. That sounds like the most depressing thing in the world. Why would I ever want to read such sadness? I have enough sadness in my day to day life. In fact, all I ever am is sad." Or, something like that. Maybe not the last part, I don't know, I was going with it. 

This book is told from the perspective of Death in WWII. Death gets intrigued by a little girl, and follows her life....and it is just....a most excellent read. I will not lie - you do need some Kleenex. But you will be very moved. And you will just want to hug the book for a very long time after, while you are just crying and thinking and staring off at the wall. I really believe you will.

2. White Oleander, by Janet Fitch.

I read this probably ten years ago, but it still stays with me. So beautifully written. 

OK you are going to think I am a depressing person. It is about a teenager going through a series of foster homes. BUT it is so beautiful and intriguing and it has a lot to say.

3. The Princess Bride

AHHG SO GOOD. Now, the movie is really great, but this book is great too! If you liked the movie you will love the book.

Ba Dam Dam! (That's the Reading Rainbow sound signaling that my book talk has ended).

I'm also looking quite radiant with a toothy smile right now. Creepy? Not creepy? Creepy.

Just a side-note that has nothing to do with books. We went on a walk today - us, the baby, the dog. The baby loved it. She loves her walks! This weather is beautifullllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll. Just wanted to give a shout out to the weather. Gorgeous!

Monday, March 19, 2012

Day 38

Yesterday I posted my post just after midnight. Even though I HAD posted my post for the felt really strange not writing a blog that day! They say it takes about 30 days to form a habit. I can truly attest to that!!

That being I am posting at a normal time. And tonight's topic: 

3 things I've been finding myself doing (and I never ever thought these things would happen)

1. Craving salads. I had one for dinner tonight and it was fantastic. It had raspberries and a little bit of cheese and a really good dressing and arugula. Oh my!

2. Actually being able to paint my own nails without it getting all over my skin and having it look like I got into some kind of horrific accident! Dios mio. My nails look pretty sweet. 

3. Caring about the way something is worded. Okay so I have cared just got real. Like....for example...I just found out that "Still Life" plural is actually "Still Lifes". It blew my mind. I mean....a still life painting is just a snap shot of life, and not really alive, and so when it is plural it can't be still lives or still living because neither of those statements are true! At least, that's why I think it's pluralized that way. Anyway sometimes I find myself thinking about things like that. I mean....I think about a lot of things. But sometimes I just get pretty amazed at why things are worded the way they are. Stevie says that jazz is the, "Truest form of expression, because it can express emotion more readily than language." That is really interesting to me, too. Where would we be without music? Where would we be without words?

Maybe we'd all just feel like gorillas trapped in a cage.

I don't know.

I really don't.

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Day 37

3 things I think a lot of people would really like

1. If those shows from the early '90s (like GUTS, Nick Arcade, Legends of the Hidden Temple, Double-Dare, were re-launched with contestants who would have watched those shows in the early '90s, so....people who are now in their '20's '30's, and beyond... and instead of getting prizes like Nerf guns (yet that would be enjoyable and fun). they could give away prizes like you'd find on The Price is Right, like, say, a trip to Spain. Yes I would watch that. And yes, I would want to partake in that. I started talking about this the other day....and the more I think about it, the more I think it is a pretty solid idea.

2. I think people would like to know about Bronies. I have my opinion about it, but it's not like I have a platform where I know many, many people are listening to what my opinion of this thing might actually be. Right? Anyway...."Bronies" actually exist.  I heard about it on NPR. Here is a link for more information..... 
I'm not going to actually go into my opinion too much, but I will say this: I believe their lives would be enhanced in a very large manner if they had jobs. Even working at a fast food restaurant. Anything. 

3. I also think a lot of people would really like going out to breakfast at least once a week. Pancakes are so nice (if you ask me). I think my quality of life would greatly be enhanced by such a movement. One breakfast outing a week....a project dedicated to life happiness. Perhaps I will try that sometime..............
Day 36

Saturday Morning. This Saturday morning.

Tastes One black. One with half and half. Warm, not too hot. Down the hatch. And baby cheeks from all the baby kisses. And fluffy, powdered-sugar-on-top-cinnamon raisin bread. 

Sounds like....Miles Davis "Kind of Blue". Dancing bouts. Laughing bursts.  Baby coos. And baby conversations, loud and soft. And Miles Davis, volume up, volume down. And singing with babies, volume up,  volume down. And pots clanging loudly, then not at all. And scrubbing the counter-tops, and moving all of the objects who live in our kitchen so their spots can be dusted and clean. And moving objects back to their places. And tap tap click clack typing. And tapping feet. And the baby's asleep. And Miles Davis is still playing. 

Smells like.....Burt's Baby Soap. And opened windows to Springtime air protruding through the late late winter morning. Smells like new born flowers just popping out of the earth with the morning dew still stuck to the green shoots. Which are everywhere. Calling us to take a walk. Calling our names.

Feels like.....snuggling with blankets and more kisses. Baby food is everywhere due to an untimely sneeze. Fresh air rushing into the house. Plastic is taken down from the wintered windows. We can breathe again. Freedom.

Looks Happiness. 

No, I didn't get a manicure today. I decided this was better. I'll get one some other day. As Meatloaf says, "Two out of three ain't bad." We're still getting a teapot. I'm still baking a cake. We just bought a new fridge (which we desperately needed because our old one started producing goo, hopefully not because of a secret vortex connecting it to the land of Vigo from Ghostbusters 2) so there really isn't extra money to get a teapot AND a manicure. Sometimes you've gotta do what you've gotta do.

           Besides, sometimes it's just more fun to be an adult.

Friday, March 16, 2012

Day 35

This weekend I plan on making 3 delightful dreams come true.

1. Get a manicure with

2. Find a teapot and buy that teapot. I must stop simply talking about the teapot. That can be a metaphor for life. Get that teapot! 

3. Bake a chocolate cake from scratch. It's my co-worker's birthday on Monday, and my turn to bring in the cake. And baking is one of my most  favorite things to do in the whole entire world. So I'm totally baking the cake. And I will be testing the batter as well. That is truly the only way to know one is on the right track as a baker. I must do what is right with that.

Those are my delightful dreams.....I hope you're making your dreams come true too this weekend. Life is too short not to ;)

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Day 34

3 Mamas I admire:

1. My Mom - 8 kids. Not a small feat.

--Something she has said, "Charity begins at home." So true, Mama Manch, so true. Gotta get what needs to get done at home, and then if you have any energy left, go out and do some more good. Volunteer or something. I love that.

2. Steve's Mom - 5 kids. Watches 3 grandkids all the time. So many little feet.

--Something she has said, "Bacon is my favorite food." It truly is delicious, and yes, it does need to be said. My goodness bacon is delicious. I haven't even had meat in months (and I'm fine with that; but I still love just the smell of bacon, that's how good it is). That lady has good taste, and is pretty amazing in many ways. 

3. Mother Teresa. A world full of kids to take care of. My goodness.

--Something she has said, "If you want a love message to be heard, it has got to be sent out. To keep a lamp burning, we have to keep putting oil in it."

So true, Mother Teresa, so true. Gotta spread the lovin' somehow.

Three mamas I love. 

I just...........I think everybody has challenges that they work through, and that they've got to work through, all the time. I think that I really admire everyone for some reason or another. I just wanted to give a little "Shout out" to some people who really know (or knew) what's up. And happen to be mamas (in one way or another).

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Day 33

3 things I'd like to do right now:

1. Sleep.
2. Eat 5 cookies.
3. Drink tea from a brand new tea kettle. I'm searching for a new one. Mine is old. I would like a pretty one. I will find it, one day. And then: I will buy it. I am confident that this will happen.

For now, I'll just go do the dishes, and have a good think about the tea kettle of my dreams.........

That definitely reminds me of something: I feel like Cinderella lately. I feel like I have a curfew just because I start getting tired around 8. I also am often doing chores. I wonder if there is a ball in my future? I should buy some new shoes, just to be prepared....

OK, so I'm going to do the dishes and have a good think about the tea kettle of my dreams and the pair of shoes I need to buy to prepare myself for the ball I'm of course going to attend.

Off I go.

What tea kettle do YOU think I should buy?

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Day 32

3 Ways to Exercise in A Pinch - The new Mom work-out that anyone can do!
Note: If you don't have a baby substitute "Baby" for "15 pound weights" if you would actually like to do these exercises.

1. Holding a baby and picking up anything from the floor (nunus (pacifier), a book, nunus, your phone, nunus, etc. etc. etc.) It feels a lot like sit ups only I feel it in my quads too. It's pretty good for toning I've found.

2. Running around your house searching for: nunus, diaper cloth, diaper, new onesie, new baby outfit, new pants for yourself (because yours has spit-up/etc., etc. on it), the diaper bag, the book you were reading during nap time, your sanity, etc. etc. (Basically I've become Inspector search for things in my house. My house is equipped with 37 black holes, and one hour in the house equates to at least half an hour as a contestant on a game show from the early '90s Nickelodeon (GUTS, Legends of the Hidden Temple, or even that video game one where they go inside the video game...Nick Arcade? Yeah...I think that one was Nick Arcade).

3. Sitting up a million times in the middle of the night because "I think I heard the baby"....that might just be me. I really don't think all moms do this, but they might? I just always think I hear her...and then I end up doing crunches from all those sit-ups when I'm trying to get a better listen.

Also notable exercises: 
-lunging for the cat/dog/household pet so they don't eat the baby food/our food/anything
-Shushing the babe when she's got a tummy ache - basically just walking around the house with the baby 
-Hiding behind something and jumping out to get a reaction. Yes, you can still do that with a 15 pound weight, but maybe you want to borrow a nephew or niece for that one or something.

Anyway - hope you liked these exercises. Repeat for best results!

Monday, March 12, 2012

Day 31

3 clues I have that I am way too tired to write anything right now.

3. I just thought my dog was a horse. Then I thought, "Why is there a house in my horse?" Then I blinked.

2. Number two. Do you remember that movie with number 5 is alive? Johnny 5? That was really a movie, right? 

1. I just pressed a button and my whole screen got really big. Well....the words on it. I mean they are huge. I mean they are Gimungo. Does this list even make sense any more?? Ahhh!

I am going to cuddle up under some blankets now. There.

Good night.

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Day 30

Top 3 Reasons why I recommend having a baby:

3. She is the most amazing thing to ever happen to us. Yes, your entire world turns upside down and shaken sideways like someone mixing up a martini for Bond. BUT - I bet those martinis are delicious. And life with our baby is the best I've ever known.

2. She makes us want to be better people. I recycle more. I eat right. I am motivated to work out. I want to take her everywhere, see the world. I want my house to be as clean as can be, just so it can be nice for her. Everything I want, I want for her. And that is the best feeling, I really don't know how else to explain it.

1. I can really come up with a million reasons why she is the greatest thing to ever happen to my life, but, if we're only going by this top three list, I want to include this: her very existence has shown me miracles exist, and are everywhere. Everywhere everywhere everywhere. She makes me feel like I've won the lottery every day. Even if Steve and I are so tired, and haven't showered in three days, and our laundry touches the skies of the heavens, and we've been working around the clock, or whatever. And that stuff doesn't even happen all the time. There are a million amazing things that happen. If you are thinking about having a baby, and you have a job, and you have a pretty good relationship with your significant other, and you LIKE kids, and you like doing things for others, I really just want to recommend this whole experience to you. I just do. And that's how I feel. 

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Day 29

I was looking through my books...and I found a book called, "Woe Is I: The Grammarphobe's Guide To Better English In Plain English"....

I have a mini-project for myself to read it and really understand it. 

I consider myself as a person who is fairly capable of employing the English Language to communicate in a clear and effective manner.....but I would like to be better at it.

There are still some grammar questions I end up having, and I end up second-guessing myself on, over and over again.

For example: I may have just made about 1,000 grammatical errors in this blog entry alone. I hope I did not, but I cannot be positive that I did not make a grammatical error. I think it would be amazing to be confident that when I write, I'm not making grammatical errors. Especially since writing is such a BIG part of my life: I write in my blog, I write my novel, I text to my friends and family, I'll "post" something on facebook, I'll try to "tweet" every so often but I have no idea what I'm doing and I end up sounding like a great-grandma every single time, and I also write emails with clients, as well as speak with my co-workers and clients. I am constantly communicating....and I do not want to be a person who is saying the wrong thing, especially inadvertently.

I believe it is extremely important for people to really learn the language they are communicating with, and attempt to understand it's mechanics, so they can really say what they need to say and not have misunderstandings over silly things. Misunderstandings can lead to so many things that are not silly. They can lead to dangerous things.

SO, really, understanding and utilizing grammar in the correct way can help to make the world a better place, which, I think you may know, I am a huge proponent of. 

Making the world a better place is why I write anything.

It's always on the forefront of my mind: I want to do everything I can to make the world a better place, for my baby Corinne, for my friends and family, for strangers, for people who have no friends or family, for Corinne's babies and friends and family, and so on and so on and so on. For everybody.

I think that it is a reasonable thing to try and do as much good as you can in your day, for your family, your friends, yourself, and then when all that is accomplished, for others beyond that. That's why I try to do as good as I can in my day, getting all of my chores done and whatnot, and just being with my family....and then....after the baby is in bed (or when she's taking a nap, like right now) and I have a little bit of time and energy, I like to write, hopefully in a way that is clear, and hopefully in a way that makes people want to read. And then, when you read, I hope it's like we're having a conversation, and maybe you are saying to yourself something like, "I really do want to make the world a better place, too. And what can I do?" And then you have a conversation with yourself. Or something. Or you just say, "Oh, that was nice." Or something like that.

And then while you're sitting there talking to yourself I've gone and picked up my grammar book I found in my house, and I'm trying to understand how to construct the next few sentences I will say to you, in our next conversation. And then I'll go back to my laptop and fiddle with the syntax and imagery and diction and characterizations in the world I am busy creating within my novel, for you to see someday. 

I guess this was all just to say, I want to really be clear with the words I choose to use, in creating positive messages to the world at large. I think that is why grammar is so important, and I hope that the rules of grammar don't disintegrate as though acid rain has fallen all over them. 

I think it's up to us all, individually, to decide whether or not we want to be positive in this world, despite what challenges have been dealt to us. And, I think it is up to us whether or not we want to try to study up on things that are important to us, so that we can be full of knowledge, and strong, and ready to communicate exactly what we think about something that's going down, in a world that....well....needs a little bit of help. 

So...grammar. Can it save the world? It cannot hurt us. I think ignoring it will hurt us more.

What do you think? 

Friday, March 9, 2012

Day 28

My week as a poem.

Night crashed into Morningtime;

the moon fell from out of our sight

and we packed up and trudged off 

to earn our stay in our little house

that sits near the trees and the water.

Tuesday was a Super day

to some in this big country.

Wednesday, we feasted upon

chocolate chip cookies



bagels bombarded with cheese.

Thursday the skies opened up

and the sun spouted out

a solar storm rained down on the world at large.

Friday the clock

refused to tick 

and when it did

it would stick

and stick

and stick


now it is dark again outside

and the moon has found his spot up in the sky

and the wind it whistles a little 

warning of the fairly sudden nature

of Sunday nights

and their tendencies to crash head-first

into glaring light of day.

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Day 27

Three things I really like:

1. Smart Mom Jewelry

I really want to buy a necklace from this place:

There are quite a few necklaces to choose from, and I'd be able to wear it and Corinne would be able to chew on it. It would be for both of us.

2. Ray Bradbury. Here is one of my favorite short stories which he wrote:
It is called "The Fog Horn"

OUT there in the cold water, far from land, we waited every night for the coming of the fog, and it came, and we oiled the brass machinery and lit the fog light up in the stone tower.  Feeling like two birds in the grey sky, McDunn and I sent the light touching out, red, then white, then red again, to eye the lonely ships.  And if they did not see our light, then there was always our Voice, the great deep cry of our Fog Horn shuddering through the rags of mist to startle the gulls away like decks of scattered cards and make the waves turn high and foam.
"It's a lonely life, but you're used to it now, aren't you?" asked McDunn.
"Yes," I said.  You're a good talker, thank the Lord."
"Well, it's your turn on land tomorrow," he said, smiling, "to dance the ladies and drink gin."
"What do you think McDunn, when I leave you out here alone?"
"On the mysteries of the sea." McDunn lit his pipe. It was a quarter past seven of a cold November evening, the heat on, the light switching it's tail in two hundred directions, the Fog Horn bumbling in the high throat of the tower.  There wasn't a town for a hundred miles down the coast, just a road, which came lonely through the dead country to the sea, with few cars on it, a stretch of two miles of cold water out to our rock, and rare few ships.
The mysteries of the sea," said McDunn thoughtfully. "You know, the ocean's the biggest damned snowflake ever? It rolls and swells a thousand shapes and colours, no two alike.  Strange.  One night, years ago, I was here alone, when all of the fish of the sea surfaced out there.  Something made them swim in and lie in the bay, sort of trembling and staring up at the tower light going red, white, red, white across them so I could see their funny eyes.  I turned cold.  They were like a big peacock's tail, moving out there until midnight.  Then, without so much as a sound, they slipped away, the million of them was gone.  I kind of think maybe, in some sort of way, they came all those miles to worship,  Strange, But think how the tower must look to them, standing seventy feet above the water, the God-light flashing out from it, and the tower declaring itself with a monster voice.  They never came back, those fish, but don't you think for a while they thought they were in the Presence?"
I shivered. I looked out at the long grey lawn of the sea stretching away into nothing and nowhere.
"Oh, the sea's full."  McDunn puffed his pipe nervously, blinking. He had been nervous all day and hadn't said why.  "For all our engines and so-called submarines, it'll be ten thousand centuries before we set foot on the real bottom of the sunken lands, in the fairy kingdoms there, and know real terror. Think of it, it's still the year 300,000 Before Christ down under there.  While we've paraded around with trumpets, lopping off each other's countries and heads, they have been living beneath the sea twelve miles deep and cold in a time as old as the beard on a comet.
"Yes it's an old world."
"Come on. I got something special I've been saving up to tell you."
We ascended the eighty steps, talking and taking our time.  At the top, McDunn switched off the room lights so there'd be no reflection in the plate glass.  The great eye of the light was humming, turning easily in its oiled socket.  the Fog Horn was blowing steadily, once every fifteen seconds.
"Sounds like an animal, don't it?" McDunn nodded to himself.  "A big lonely animal crying in the night.  Sitting here on the edge of ten million years calling out to the deeps.  I'm here, I'm here, I'm here.  And the Deeps do answer, yes, they do.  You been here now for three months Johnny, so I better prepare you.  About this time of year," he said, studying the murk and fog, "something comes to visit the lighthouse."
"The swarms of fish like you said?'
"No, this is something else.  I've put off telling you because you might think I'm daft.  But tonight's the latest I can put it off, for if my calender's marked right from last year, tonight's the night it comes.  I won't go into detail, you'll have to see it for yourself.  Just sit down there.  If you want, tomorrow you can pack your duffel and take the motorboat into land and get your car parked there at the dinghy pier on the cape and drive on back to some little inland town and keep your lights burning nights.  I won't question or blame you.  It's happened three years now, and this is the only time anyone's been here with me to verify it.  You wait and watch."
Half an hour passed with only a few whispers between us.  When we grew tired waiting, McDunn began describing some of his ideas to me.  He had some theories about the Fog Horn itself.
"One day many years ago a man walked along and stood in the sound of the ocean on a cold sunless shore and said "We need a voice to call across the water, to warn ships; I'll make one.  I'll make a voice that is like an empty bed beside you all night long, and like an empty house when you open the door, and like the trees in autumn with no leaves.  A sound like the birds flying south, crying, and a sound like November wind and the sea on the hard, cold shore.  I'll make a sound that's so alone that no one can miss it, that whoever hears it will weep in their souls, and to all who hear it in the distant towns.  I'll make me a sound and an apparatus and they'll call it a Fog Horn and whoever hears it will know the sadness of eternity and the briefness of life.""
The Fog Horn blew.
"I made up that story," said McDunn quietly, "to try to explain why this thing keeps coming back to the lighthouse every year.  The fog horn calls, I think, it comes..."
"But-" I said.
"Sssst!"  said McDunn.  "There!" He nodded out to the Deeps.
Something was swimming towards the lighthouse tower.
It was a cold night, as I said; the high tower was cold, the light coming and going, and the Fog Horn calling and calling through the ravelling mist.  You couldn't see far and you couldn't see plain, but there was the deep sea moving on it's way about the night earth, flat and quiet, to colour of grey mud, and here were the two of us alone in the high tower, and there, far out at first, was a ripple, followed by a wave, a rising, a bubble, a bit of froth/ And then, from the surface of the cold sea came a head, a large head, dark-coloured, with immense eyes, and then a neck And then-not a body-but more neck and more! The head rose a full forty feet above the water ona slender and beautiful neck.  Only then did the body, like a little island of black coral and shells and crayfish, drip up from the subterranean.  There was a flicker of tail.  In all, from head to tip of tail, I estimated the monster at ninety or a hundred feet.
I don't know what I said.  I said something.
"Steady, bot, steady," whispered McDunn.
"It's impossible!" I said.
"No, Johnny, we're impossible. It's like it always was ten million years ago. It hasn't changed.. It's us and the land that've changed, become impossible. Us!"
It swam slowly and with a great majesty out in the icy waters, far away.  the fog came and went about it, momentarily erasing its shape.  One of the monster eyes caught and held and flashed back our immense light, red, white, red, white, like a disc held high and sending a message in primaeval code.  It was as silent as the fog through which it swam.
"It's a dinosaur of some sort!" I crouched down, holding to the stair rail.
"Yes, one of the tribe."
"But they died out!"
"No, only hid away in the Deeps, Deep, deep down in the deepest Deeps.  Isn't that a word now, Johnny, a real word, it says so much: the Deeps.  There's all the coldness and darkness and deepness in the worldin a word like that."
"What'' we do?"
"Do? We got our job, we can't leave.  besides, we're safer here than in any boat trying to get to land.  That thing's as big as a destroyer and almost as swift."
"But here, why does it come here?"
The next moment I has my answer.
The Fog Horn blew.
And the monster answered.
A cry came across a million years of water and mist.  A cry so anguished and alone it shuddered in my head and my body.  The monster cried out at the tower.  The Fog Horn blew.  The monster roared again.  The Fog Horn blew. The monster opened its great toothed mouth and the sound that came from it was the sound of the Fog Horn itself.  Lonely and vast and far away.  The sound of isolation, a viewless sea, a cold night, apartness. That was the sound.
"Now," whispered McDunn, "do you know why it comes here?"
I nodded.
"All year long, Johnny, that poor monster there lying far out, a thousand miles at sea, and twenty miles deep maybe, biding its time, perhaps a million years old, this one creature.  Think of it, waiting a million years; could youwait that long? Maybe it's the last of its kind.  I sort of think that's true.  Anyway, here come men on land and build this lighthouse, five years agao.  And set up their Fog Horn and sound it and sound it out towards the place where you bury yourself in sleep and sea memories of a world where there were thousands like yourself, but now you're alone, all alone in a world that's not made for you, a world where you have to hide.
"But the sound of the Fog Horn comes and goes, comes and goes, and you stir from the muddy bottom of the Deeps, and your eyes open like the lenses of two-foot cameras and you move, slow, slow, for you have the ocean sea on your shoulders, heavy.  But that Fog Horn comes through a thousand miles of water, faint and familiar, and the furnace in your belly stokes up, and you begin to rise, slow, slow.  You feed yourself on minnows, on rivers of jellyfish, and you rise slow through the autumn months, through September when the fogs started, through October with more fog and the horn still calling you on, and then, late in November, after pressurizing yourself day by day, a few feet higher every hour, you are near the surface and still alive.  You've got to go slow; if you surfaced all at once you'd explode. So it takes you all of three months to surface, and then a number of days to swim through the cold waters to the lighthouse. And there you are, out there, in the night, Johnny, the biggest damned monster in creation.  And here's the lighthouse calling to you, with a long neck like your neck sticking way up out of the water, and a body like your body, and most important of all, a voice like your voice.  Do you understand now, Johnny, do you understand?"
The Fog Horn blew.
The monster answered.
I saw it all, I knew it all-the million years of waiting alone, for someone to come back who never came back. The million years of isolation at the bottom of the sea, the insanity of time there, while the skies cleared of reptile-birds, the swamps fried on the continental lands, the sloths and sabre-tooths had there day and sank in tar pits, and men ran like white ants upon the hills.
The Fog Horn Blew.
"Last year," said McDunn, "that creature swam round and round, round and round, all night.  Not coming to near, puzzled, I'd say.  Afraid, maybe.  And a bit angry after coming all this way.  But the next day, unexpectedly, the fog lifted, the sun came out fresh, the sky was as blue as a painting.  And the monster swam off away from the heat and the silence and didn't come back. I suppose it's been brooding on it for a year now, thinking it over from every which way."
The monster was only a hundred yards off now, it and the Fog Horn crying at each other.  As the lights hit them, the monster's eyes were fire and ice, fire and ice.
"That's life for you," said McDunn. "Someone always waiting for someone who never comes home. Always someone loving some thing more than that thing loves them. And after a while you want to destroy whatever that thing is, so it can hurt you no more."
The monster was rushing at the lighthouse.
The Fog Horn blew.
"Let's see what happens," said McDunn.
He switched the Fog Horn off.
The ensuing minute of silence was so intense that we could hear our hearts pounding in the glassed area of the tower, could hear the slow greased turn of the light.
The monster stopped and froze.  It's great lantern eyes blinked. Its mouth gaped. It gave a sort of rumble, like a volcano.  It twitched its head this way and that, as if to seek the sounds now dwindled off in the fog. It peered at the lighthouse. It rumbled again. Then its eyes caught fire. It reared up, threshed the water, and rushed at the tower, its eyes filled with angry torment.
"McDunn!" I cried. "Switch on the horn!"
McDunn fumbled with the switch.  But even as he switched it on, the monster was rearing up.  I had a glimpse of its gigantic paws, fishskin glittering in webs between the finger-like projections, clawing at the tower.  The huge eye on the right side of its anguished head glittered before me like a cauldron into which I might drop, screaming.  The tower shook.  The Fog Horn cried; the monster cried.  It seized the tower and gnashed at the glass, which shattered in upon us.
McDunn seized my arm. "Downstairs!"
The tower rocked, trembled, and started to give.  The Fog Horn and the monster roared.  We stumbled and half fell down the stairs. "Quick!"
We reached the bottom as the tower buckled down towards us.  We ducked under the stairs in the small stone cellar.  There were a thousand concussions as the rocks rained down; the Fog Horn stopped abruptly. The monste crashed upon the tower.  The tower fell.  We knelt together, McDunn and I holding tight, while our world exploded.
Then it was over and there was nothing but darkness and the wask of the sea on the raw stones.
That and the other sound.
"Listen," said McDunn quietly. "Listen."
We waited a moment. And then I began to hear it.  First a great vacuumed sucking of air, and then the lament, the bewilderment, the loneliness of the great monster, folded over upon us, above us, so that the sickening reek of its body filled the air, a stone's thickness away from our cellar.  The monster gasped and cried.  The tower was gone. The light was gone. The thing that had called it across a million years was gone.  And the monster was opening its mouth and sending out great sounds.  the sounds of a Fog Horn, again and again.  And ships far at sea, not finding the light, not seeing anything, but passing and hearing late that night must've thought: There it is, the lonely sound, the Lonesome Bay horn. All's well. We've rounded the cape.
And so it went for the rest of that night.
The sun was hot and yellow the next afternoon when the rescuers came to dig us from our stoned-under cellar.
"It fell apart, is all," said McDunn gravely.  "We had a few bad knocks from the waves and it just crumbled." He pinched my arm.
There was nothing to see.  The ocean was calm, the sky blue.  The only thing was a great algaic stink from the green matter that covered the fallen tower stones and the shore rocks. Flies buzzed about.  The ocean washed empty on the shore.
The next year they built a new lighthouse, but by that time I had a job in the little town and a wife and a good small warm house that glowed yellow on autumn nights, the doors locked, the chimney puffing smoke.  As for McDunn. he was master of the new lighthouse, built to his own specifications, out of steel-reinforced concrete. "Just in case," he said.
The new lighthouse was ready in November.  I drove down alone one evening late and parked my car and looked across the grey waters and listened to the new horn sounding, once, twice, three, four times a minute far out ther by itself.
The monster?
It never came back.
"It's gone away," said McDunn.  "It's gone back to the Deeps.  It's learned you can't love anything too much in this world.  It's gone into the deepest Deeps to wait another million years.  Ah, the poor thing!  Waiting out there, and waiting out there, while man comes and goes on this pitiful little planet.  Waiting and waiting.
I sat in my car, listening.  I couldn't see the lighthouse or the light standing out in Lonesome Bay.  I could only hear the Horn, the Horn, the Horn.  It sounded like the monster calling.
I sat there wishing there was something I could say.

Isn't that so so so so so so good??? Ahh!

3. Going out to dinner. I get to go out to dinner with Stevie soon. We have gone out exactly once a month since the baby has been born. I really can't wait. We even have a gift card, courtesy of a very good friend! Hooray for fancy dinners!

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Day 26

Karma Chameleon = me.

I baked a batch of cookies last night.

I gave them away at work.

(I also ate one or two myself....yum).



Due to something wrong with the electricity, we were let out early!




I love you so.

I'm tellin' ya....kindness wins every time.

Not only can you help others

But the universe has a way

of helping you

when you help

other people.

At least

that's what

I think.

I am a total advocate for kindness....if you don't believe that this is magical, you should do a kindness experiment of your own. 

You would be surprised what happens.......

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Day 25

Wow, I can't believe I am 1/4 of the way through my goal!

When I've met my goal of 100 posts, it will be May. 

At least, if I have the counting done correctly!

This makes me think....

Here are some speculations that I have about May.

I wonder if I will be bathing suit ready at that point?

I wonder if there is such a thing as bathing suit ready?

Maybe I will be so bathing suit ready I will be a bathing beauty.

I wonder if I'll have started work on my garden at that point?

Maybe it will be glorious and so full of flowers people will walk into our back yard and faint at the prettiness.

Probably it will not be started yet.

I wonder if we'll be going on nightly walks with the baby and our dog at that point?

I wonder if we'll have gone to the market with Corinne yet?

I want to use our little carrier thing that would go on Steve or I and just shop at the market. I want to do this so badly. I want her to see everything. 

I wonder if my novel will actually be totally proofread by that point?
Ahhh my novel it is getting so good! AHH!

I wonder if we'll have a new fridge, that doesn't ooze out ooze?

(I wonder why we do not have a new fridge yet that does not ooze out ooze?)

I wonder, I wonder, I wonder.

Anyway --

3 reasons why I'm baking cookies tonight:

1. To spread a little lovin' 

2. So I can have an excuse to dance around the kitchen and perhaps have a spoonful of cookie dough

3. Because cookies are delicious.

That is all.